When Facebook makes life better

Vietnam's model of what social media could be

Sep 07, 2023

The most curious thing about Vietnam that I’ve noticed, since my move two and a half years ago, is how useful Facebook is here. To the point where not having it would actually make life challenging.

Wherever else I’ve lived in the world, Facebook was always that black hole where time vanished, a part of my life that I tolerated because I craved the validation from five people liking yet another selfie I had posted.

But Vietnam has elevated Facebook to a whole other level. It’s become a part of my life here that I fully embrace—in fact, deeply appreciate.

Here’s why.

A wealth of (useful) information

First off, I wouldn’t even be in Vietnam if it wasn’t for Facebook.

My partner—whom I met while traveling—is a long-time Vietnam expat. I knew early on that he was worth the move and my plan was always to join him here. The only problem: I had a couple of years left in my obligation to the Thai government to live and work in Thailand as a former scholar.1 And so our relationship began long-distance.

The lucky bugger that I am, as soon as my obligation finished, Covid started its rampage. Borders were closed. I was now free to leave, but forbidden to enter. For months, my partner and I stumbled in the dark trying to scrape together information on how I could make my move, increasingly frustrated and utterly helpless.

Entered Facebook. My partner posted a question in one of Vietnam’s countless Facebook groups—they proliferate like mushrooms here—and someone pointed him to another Facebook group specifically for people looking to enter Vietnam during Covid. It’s possible, he was told. All the information is there.

I joined that Facebook group, and suddenly the blindfold fell off. It was possible. In fact, dozens were doing it every single day. That group had thousands of members, and a fair number were posting detailed guides of how they did it—which airlines were flying in, who to email, where best to quarantine, which approvals to obtain, how long each step would take… the whole nine yards.

The group became indispensable during those stressful months where I attempted to navigate entering a country with closed borders. I asked numerous questions, got clear and helpful answers. At the end of the arduous process, like the many who came before, I posted my own detailed guide as a thank you to the group, a “pay it forward” gesture that I hoped would lessen the confusion of someone else still overwhelmed by the extremely messy process.

Without that Facebook group, I wouldn’t have made it to Vietnam as early as I did, right in the midst of Covid. I wouldn’t have already been living with my partner when Ho Chi Minh City went into complete lockdown. I would have missed out on the countless moments of joy we shared in our two-bedroom, including—but not limited to—our spontaneous decision to shave both our heads because why not.

valsaksornchai

A post shared by @valsaksornchai

That group was my first experience of how Facebook could be something other than a sinkhole. And it was upwards from there. The wealth of information Facebook never fails to provide soon made it an integral part of my life in Vietnam.

Need an excellent English-speaking hairdresser? Facebook. Want to book a table at a restaurant where the staff are unlikely to speak enough English to book over the phone? Facebook. Wondering where to buy five-year diaries? Facebook. Looking for a driver for the day? Facebook. Recommendations for a psychiatrist? Facebook. Where to get my rings resized? Facebook. Wanting to make a new friend over coffee? Facebook.

Whatever question I asked, Facebook always had an answer. A good one.

A model of what could be

My surprising experience of Facebook in Vietnam has led me to rethink my entire approach to social media. It set off a chain of reflections, and actions, that culminated in the realisation that this favourite culprit for time wasting could actually be used to live a better life.

I realised that, instead of scrolling aimlessly, I could be far more strategic with my time on social media. So I began training myself to be more intentional each time I went online.

Nowadays, the first thing I do when I get on Facebook is check out what questions had recently been asked in a Facebook group for women in Ho Chi Minh City,2 and see if there are any I can answer. Someone’s desperately looking for a hairdresser? I recommend mine. A newbie in town wants to make friends? I volunteer a coffee date. A cry for help from a stressed out gal? I offer up my de-stressing techniques and wish her luck.

And—more importantly—every time I’m online, I make sure to always interact with at least one friend. I’ll see who I haven’t caught up with recently from my Facebook Messenger chat list and arrange a meet-up. I’ll slide into the DM of friends whose stories I’m viewing on Instagram to leave a reaction, a comment, a virtual hug.

The more strategically I used social media, the more rewarding—even miraculous—it became. I made new friends in real life, rekindled fraying friendships, came to feel much more connected with the wonderful people in my life.

I won’t dispute that social media can be a time sink—it sure is when used aimlessly. But social media with a purpose can truly enhance your life in tangible ways.

As it did mine.

What do you think?

Vietnam has accomplished the miraculous feat of making Facebook useful, and I genuinely can’t imagine my life here without it. I’m curious how useful Facebook is where you are in the world (feel free to tell me), but here’s a more important question for you:

How do you use social media?

Is it a black hole you tolerate, or a treasured part of your life? Any tips you’d like to share on how to be more strategic/intentional? Please hit “reply” or leave a comment—I read every response and I’d love to hear from you. If you want, share this with someone whose social media presence brings you joy.